Um. Fans of Kristoffersen and Hirscher don't hate me. I'm afraid your men have not had a good first run in the slalom. Softer course conditions could be to blame again.
Hirscher is 1.2 secs behind the leading pace of Austria's Mario Matt with Kristoffersen 1.7 secs adrift.
A massive 117 competitors will slalom between the 60 gates that pepper the wooded slopes of the Rhosa Khutor Alpine Center. Three favorites for the gold medal: Austria's world champion Marcel Hirscher, his good friend German Felix Neureuther and Norway's Henrik Kristoffersen.
For those of you for whom alpine skiing is your legal drug of choice - hands up! - then the highs of the men's slalom are coming up soon.
And from that to a brief doping update...
What that basically boils down to is that we have four more gold medals today. Whoop! And there's also the bronze medal in the men's ice hockey - did someone say U.S. v Finland showdown? - as well as the arrival of the muscle men in the four-man bobsleigh crews.
Here's a reminder of the remaining action today:
1245: First run in the men's alpine skiing slalom
1350: Men's speed skating team pursuit finals
1415: Women's speed skating team pursuit finals
1430: Men's 4x7.5km biathlon relay begins
1500: USA v Finland in ice hockey bronze medal match
1615: Medals decided in men's slalom second run
1630: Four-man bobsleigh first run, final runs Sunday
Hello again. Good news, I'm back. And here's some more good news, I've been joined by my colleague Tom McGowan, who is currently preparing himself for his penultimate Winter Olympics stint with a hearty brunch of rice, peas, chorizo and chicken. Very fancy.
After that excitement, there will be a mini hiatus while I pop over to the kitchen for a drinks break. Back sooon!
So, 26-year-old Dujmovit, who took up snowboarding at the age of nine, becomes the first-ever parallel snowboarding slalom champion as she recovers from a wobble to beat Germany's Anke Karstens by just 0.12 seconds. The bronze goes to fellow German Amelie Kober.
Have two golds ever come in such quick succession in Sochi? Stay with me for the first slalom snowboarding golds are about to be handed out...
In the first run of the men's semifinals, big favorite Vic Wild has cracked under pressure from Benjamin Karl. He finishes 1.12 seconds behind the Austrian. Big gap to make up now for a place in the final.
Well Sharon, we have to go back to the parallel slalom right now because...
Yes, Norway's Iron Lady takes the title from her compatriots in the final two kilometers, winning by 2.6 seconds. It's silver for Therese Johaug and bronze for Kristin Stoermer Steira.
The classical grace of the alpine skiing comes to an end today with the men's slalom bringing the curtain down. The man to watch is Austrian world champion Marcel Hirscher. The 24-year-old says: "I'll try everything and take as many risks as possible, with the knowledge that it could go wrong." Hirscher finished fifth at the Vancouver Games four years ago and is out for his first Olympic medal.
As a big fan of Russian dolls, I have to agree Angie. As a child I used to spend ages frustratingly trying to prise open the smallest doll... until I realized it didn't actually open.